Growing up, my home was always filled with music. My mom is a beautiful singer and can often be heard singing or humming favorite songs. My dad, although he lacks some vocal talent and rhythm, makes up for it with soul and the desire to move and groove to a beat.
At a young age, I was introduced to Bob Seger, The Eagles and Chicago. Road trips were filled with good music and loud, usually off-key, voices. To this day, I think better with music in the background rather than silence. Whenever I hear a song, I’m quick to sing along or bust out the little moves I have. Some songs get my toes tapping and head bobbing; others stir my heart.
During our 18-month struggle with infertility, I’ve had a difficult time praying and speaking to God. I often didn’t have words to say and would just sit in silence. My heart was heavy with emotions, and I couldn’t find the words. So when I didn’t have the words, I borrowed the words of many others through music.
Worship through music has brought me comfort and nearness with the Lord. Sometimes I let the lyrics wash over me. Other times, I sing to God with all the strength in me. During this time, worship through music is when my heart feels closest to the Lord.
Many songs have touched my heart over the last year, but my favorites are from Jourdan Burks’ album, Mend. She is a talented singer at our church, and I’ve been blessed to hear her many times. I bought her CD during the month I was undergoing fertility shots. To this day, that month was the hardest, most heartbreaking time in my life, especially because the treatment was unsuccessful.
Jourdan’s CD was the only music that played in my car during that time. All my feelings were expressed through her lyrics. Each song is wonderful, but the one that resonated the most with me is Right Here.
I know that you are with me
But I feel so alone
I know you have my future
But it seems unknown
When my heart is hurting
And the pieces fall apart again
When I can’t make sense of it all
You’re still holding me
Lord you are right here with me
Your heart breaks with each tear
You know what’s on the other side
You calm while I’m here
And you are right here with me
You whisper in my ear
I can’t see past this moment
Bring peace while I am here
Lord you know
And you are good
All your promises are true
You are faithful
You are love
And I am yours
Lord you are right here with me
Your heart breaks with each tear
You know what’s on the other side
You calm while I’m here
And you are right here with me
You whisper in my ear
I can’t see past this moment
Bring peace while I am here
My hope in writing this is to encourage you to use and express the talents God gave you. If you feel moved to write, sing, draw, dance, do it for His glory, and He can do amazing things through it. Jourdan doesn’t know me or about my struggle, but God used her words and talent to bring comfort to my heart and allow me to draw closer to Him.
I am incredibly thankful for her lyrics and even more thankful that God is indeed good and that He loves me more than I know. It’s true. He’s right here.
